| Opposites
Attract
Written
and moderated by Adrienne Gusoff
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Dear
Babe:
I'm very attracted to a woman who is completely different from me:
I'm white, she's black. I'm a divorced, suburban Dad; she's a "dancer"
(her words, not mine). We met at the health club and she's making
overtures that I should ask her out, but I have NO idea where to start.
Where do I begin a conversation with her?
--Opposites Attract
Dear Opposites:
OK, let's begin with the assumption that you're physically attracted
to her (otherwise you wouldn't be asking me this question) and she's
physically attracted to you (which she obviously is).
You've obviously had some conversation with her as she's already
told you she's a dancer. I assume, however, conversation did not flow
naturally and now you want to know how to keep things moving. You
two are obviously so different, you're probably thinking you'll have
nothing to talk about.
The question is, do you really want to talk to her or do you just
want make small talk until you can go somewhere private and get down
and nasty with her?
If you're hoping for a meaningful relationship, then ask her out for
coffee or a health shake and see how things go. (You can ask her about
herself, about her life, about her career. Asking a lot of questions
can make anyone seem like a great conversationalist.) If you find
each other interesting and the chit chat flows naturally, wonderful!
Then you don't need me to tell you how to have a conversation.
If you find you have nothing to say to each other, that you have no
interest in each other's life story, but are both overwhelmed by the
desire to hump each other madly until you're crippled and sore, that's
wonderful, too. You still don't need me to give you hints on
making conversation. Making whoopie, maybe, but conversation? No..
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