| Short
and Sweet
Written
and moderated by Adrienne Gusoff
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Dear
Babe:
This is coming from halfway across the world from a little country
named Singapore. I'm a 19-year-old male and have never been romantically
involved before. My friends find this peculiar, as I'm warm, friendly
and popular. I'm also confident, well spoken, have no problems chatting
up women and have an active interest in sports, namely rugby. The
only obvious problem I might have would be my height. I'm short, even
by Asian standards (not that I'm personally affected by it). Does
height really matter? Is that a problem that has affected my romantic
exploits? How can I get myself hooked up?
--Short and Sweet
Dear S&S:
I won't deny that certain attributes or lack thereof (physical or
otherwise), might limit your romantic possibilities, but that doesn't
mean you will never find love. You might just have to work
a bit harder to win women over.
You're only 19, which may seem "old" to have never been involved with
a woman, but really, you're still quite young, so don't give up hope!
Younger men and women tend to place more emphasis on physical appearance
than on personality and character. As they mature, they come to realize
it's more important to be with a loving, caring, honest, emotionally-healthy
person than with a beautiful body lacking any real substance. You
may find, as you get older, that the women you date will be more inclined
to take you as a full package, and not be put off by your height.
Or, perhaps the women you meet are not specifically put off
by your height but by something else entirely. For example, you say
you're not affected by your height. But if, in fact, you are
being judged by your stature, how can it not affect your self-confidence,
even in subtle ways? Maybe that's the real issue. If you're asking
women out and they're rebuffing your advances, it's up to you to figure
out why, because otherwise you'll never be able to correct the behavior
that's turning them off. If you're comfortable and confident enough,
ask them. They may not give you totally honest answers, but after
a hearing what a few women have to say, you might be able to read
between the lines and get a consensus. At least it will give you a
place to start. Good luck!
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